Hello MEN…

I don’t know what’s going on with me today or what’s happening in the cosmos (I haven’t checked lol) but I do know that my time was up tomorrow (sounds morbid I know), I shared THIS.

Now I’m in no way, shape or form qualified to be giving you any advice. Believe me when I say my life has been far from perfect – so I don’t write these posts to say I’ve got it all sorted and what not. Trust me, I don’t. Some days I wake up feeling like I can conquer the world and other days, I find it hard to even want to get outta bed. It’s life init. So when you read my posts – remind yourself that, and remind yourself that it’s actually normal to be human.

Now… I feel as though I need to dive straight into being vulnerable in this post. Fellas this one’s for you.

I’m sick of dealing with egos. But maybe your girl isn’t. Maybe your friends aren’t. Maybe you aren’t. But I am.

If you identify as ‘male’ and you’re reading this… Here’s what I wanna say to you.

When it comes down to it, a woman who truly loves you does not give a fuck about how much money you have or what job you work at. BELIEVE ME. They don’t care if you own 5 mansions or are $50k in debt. They don’t care what car you drive. They don’t care how you dress. They don’t care what you can buy for them or if they have to support you until you get on your feet again.

So many of you have major ego issues. Don’t get me wrong, SO DO I and so does every other human on this planet. As for me, I’ve made it a habit to make sure that regardless of how my ego shows up, I will go above and beyond to make sure it isn’t affecting anyone’s life and I sure as hell will not go to sleep at night knowing I’m hurting someone. Many of you do.

Now I’m no angel and believe me I’ve made my fair share of mistakes over the years, so I get it. I get the male gender a lot better than I let show. The thing you guys struggle with, is vulnerability.

Btw…. this isn’t ALL men. But most of you. This includes your roles as bosses, maybe even brothers or fathers. Now I haven’t got a son, but I have a nephew who’s nearly 1 and I know I’ll be doing everything in my power to make sure he grows up to be happy. Genuinely happy.

I don’t say these things to drag your egos. I know at times it can be perceived like that, but I do it because you genuinely deserve to be happy. It’s clear you’re not by the way you treat women – and most of it, treat each other (this applies for females too but I’ll get to that another time).

If your girl/ wife/ sister or WHOEVER doesn’t appreciate you, you’re still enough.

Stop letting other people dictate how you see yourself or force you into trying to be someone you don’t feel right being.

How do you feel about yourself? And fuck people’s opinions too. Do you genuinely think you’re a good person? Are people’s lives better or worse because of you? Are you loving someone more than hurting them? Are people better off without you in their lives?

Truly answer these questions. You don’t need to share it with anyone, but be real about it.

And for God’s sake, stop hurting people. Whether it’s physically, mentally or emotionally – deal with your inner conflicts on your own or speak with someone you trust. But work through it!

The older I get, the more I realise how many issues men actually struggle with themselves and I want to tell you that it’s FINE to not be ok. It’s fine to cry. It’s fine that you’re hurting. It’s fine if your girl broke up with you and started dating your mate… you don’t need her. You’re perfect the way you are, because there is no other way to be than how you are.

It doesn’t matter if you’re anorexic or have the sexiest face and body in the gym. Eventually, if they can’t attack your appearance they’ll look for a character flaw to pinpoint; and if you’re a good person with a good heart, someone’s gonna find you ugly. THAT’S LIFE AND IT HAPPENS TO ALL OF US.

If you haven’t already, you’ll find your wife – and if she truly loves you, you won’t ever question yourself, even on your very worst days. Don’t settle. Stop trying to force a woman to see something in you. SEE IT IN YOURSELF. And if you can’t – it’s FINE. Life goes on and it WILL get better.

If there’s anything I’ve learned over the years, it’s the spiritual power females possess within us. There’s so much more to life than meets the eye (another story for another time) but the most important thing I’ve come to realise, is that a woman can make or break you. I’m not even talking about in a physical/ financial sense.. I’m talking about your spirit and the way you see you.

Don’t hurt people in the process of fighting yourself. Don’t let your inability to admit your wrongs lead you down a path in life where you’re unhappy and angry with the world – just because it’s reflecting yourself back to you. Tell your mum you love her. Tell your sister you appreciate her. Stop telling your girlfriend about your ex – we don’t give a fuck.

Take steps forward that genuinely feel good to you. Surround yourself with good mates. Fuck being around people who A – make you feel like you have something to prove or B -make you feel worse than better. I also mean, genuinely feel better – not boosting your ego.

There’s parts about yourself you’re not gonna like, or that you’re ashamed of. There are things about everyone that would suprise you. The things you battle with are more common than you realise. It’s all fine – none of this was meant to be perfect and you weren’t put on this earth to follow the steps that society has placed on you.

Do your best with where you are, but be aware of where you are. Awareness precedes choice, which precedes change.

We don’t need to be in therapy talking to strangers about people we’re meant to care about. It seems whack (and I’m a Psychology student). Learn to talk things out.

You’re meant for more than just finding someone to love you or questioning why they don’t. Learn to understand people and help them understand you… and accept that not everyone will, in which case, stay away from them before it turns you into someone you don’t like.

If what I say resonates, then I hope you keep reminding yourself of it.
If it doesn’t – if you think it’s absolute bs – that’s cool too.
Everything is perspective, right.
It’s not my job to force you to convince me. Quite frankly I don’t care if you do or you don’t.
But I know if I don’t share some of these posts, then I’m doing both you and myself a disservice.

Imagine if all social media got deleted tomorrow, along with the possessions you own, and all we had were ourselves and our ability to genuinely connect with another person.
A lot of this doesn’t matter (and I know it’s easier said than done) but try to see the bigger picture.

So fellas, I hope you learn to truly be happy.
I hope you learn to appreciate all the good that comes your way and get rid of everything that doesn’t feel right.
Critique yourself before you critique another and know that because you messed up yesterday doesn’t mean you can’t do things differently today.

If you can’t do anything for this world… if you literally have NOTHING to offer, then that’s fine. It doesn’t make you less of a man than Bob or any other dude who might have $5M sitting in the bank.

If you can’t provide love in any way/ shape or form, just don’t cause any pain. That’s already a difference in itself.

Fuck letting this world tell you who you should and shouldn’t be (even me, if you think all this is bullshxt). Your opinion is still your opinion and it’s still valid.

Thank you for reading.